An Irish Mammy’s Fairytale of New York

New York

Read with the tune of ‘Fairytale of New York’ in your head

It’s Christmas week babe,
In our wild house,
The eldest said to me, won’t ate another thing,
And then he threw a dance,
The same ol’ meltdown tune,
I turned my face away,
And dreamed about school.

Well I ain’t the lucky one,
Couldn’t get the number one,
I’ve got a headache,
‘Cos Smyths was like a zoo,
So happy Christmas
I should’ve shopped online ,
I can see a calmer time,
When all my shopping’s done.

They’ve got lists long as arms,
They think mother spins gold,
But the credit cards declined it’s too late and too cold,
When they first made their lists,
On a cold Winter’s day,
They promised no changes were waiting for me.

They are handsome
Sometimes petty,
Kings of Lego city,
When mama finished cleaning
They dirtied some more,
Crosby was dreaming,
While this mammy was singing
She kissed their wee foreheads
Then drank through the night.

The boys who have ADHD tire,
While waiting for the Sleigh
And this mammy’s crying out
For Christmas Day

Ye are pups
Ye are scuts
Ye’re full up on junk
Playing there with old toys, hidin’ shit in the trunk,
Ye rugrats, ye maggots
Can’t ye see mums run ragged
Happy Christmas me arse
I pray God my wine lasts

You boys are driving us mad
But we love ye, now go and play
And the bells are ringing out
For Christmas Day.

I could have been an aunt,
Well so could anyone,
Those boys came outta me,
I’ve scars to prove it.
Ah god bless them babe,
Can’t believe their our very own,
Cost us a fortune but
I’ve build my dreams around them

You boys are energetic and fun,
We love ye, in every way
And you lads are making this
An awesome day.

This was originally published on Firefly

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About the Author

Geraldine Renton
Geraldine Renton lives in Galway city with her husband and three young sons. Life changed dramatically for Geraldine and her family back in 2008 when her eldest son, Ethan, was diagnosed with a life limiting condition known as Hunter Syndrome. Looking for an outlet for herself mainly, Geraldine began taking regular creative writing classes. In 2015, she wrote her first article which MummyPages published. Since then, she has continued to have her articles published all over the world. Geraldine writes openly and honestly about life with Ethan, often finding humour where others would neglect to look. You can also find plenty of Geraldine’s childhood stories throughout her website (http://geraldinerenton.com). In 2016 her blog “It’s Me & Ethan” won Best New Blog (2016), awarded by the Irish Bloggers Association. Geraldine continues to write regularly, not only on her own website but also for others. She is also writing a book! She has a non-fiction short story with ‘The One Million Project’, a global network of writers and illustrators coming together to publish a book in aid of different charities in the UK. The book is due for publication at the end of this year. When she’s not writing, Geraldine is a keen photographer and enjoys life with all her boys. She tells The Galway Eye she knows far too much about LEGO NINJAGO, Minecraft and how to burp on demand [*raises eyebrows* – Ed.] She possibly [no doubt about it – Ed.] has a Netflix addiction and recently became part of the Stream Team UK and Ireland for Netflix, running a Facebook page all about Netflix. Her motto in life is a lot like Ferris Bueller’s – enjoy the littlest of moments for they are the moments that make up a lifetime of memories.

3 Comments on "An Irish Mammy’s Fairytale of New York"

  1. Loving this so much

  2. This is hilarious

Comments are closed.